Here comes the drill...

Final few hours before the well-dreaded farewell... again...

It's always the hardest during the last night.. the anxiety.. the churning in the stomach... the thought of needing to hold and to be held while you try to cherish and soak in every single moment of it....

Then again, that's the beauty of a long-distance-marriage.

When moments as such become scarce, every single tear or laughter becomes so much more appreciated.

He had to work really long hours yesterday with quite a lot of mental turnmoil happening to him... Real estate is definitely a tough business to be in... So I was home, praying for him and occupying myself in ways I know, just to lessen a lil burden for him...

To my great surprise, he dropped by home around 3pm (during a 2-hour gap before his next appointment) with these...

... from my new-found fav bakery :)

My man, he is big on Love Through Actions. The biggest reason why I love him so much!

Then it was back to work and dealing with difficult buyers and vendors and even colleagues for him... While I waited patiently at home, prepared dinner, and waited nearly two hours for him to be back, heated up the meal, and we had the most awesome time eating dinner while watching Games of Thrones (with me closing my eyes most of the time during this particular episode lol)..

Best part was, despite the food being a lil cold after so long, Alex told me I did a good job and personally I too think I served up a rather decent meal lol. We had roasted chicken wings and potatoes (which I marinated overnight with fish sauce, soy sauce, brown sugar, salt, chilli powder, lots of crushed garlic and sesame seeds) and a cabbage + carrot slaw (cooked with sweet chilli sauce and a self made vinaigrette)~

After a playful night and lots of teasing and chats and a restful sleep, I got up with him at 6.30 in the morning, made him his usual breakfast, sat on the toilet bowl and chatted with him while he showered and finally sent him off to work with a tight hug and a word of prayer..... Now here I am, penning this entry...

You see, LDM is tough, and not an ideal situation to be in...

But all these little things make it so worth it.

I find JOY in the waiting, in the every single little opportunities which I could play my role as a wife, being able to pray for him before he leaves home, cleaning up after cooking him a meal, whenever he surprises me with his thoughtfulness, when he makes me feel beautiful, when he sucks in his displeasure with me and lets me get away with certain things, and the list goes on...

I found gardening a therapeutic experience (only here in New Zealand shall I stress lol)...

... especially at such a charming transition of autumn/winter... 
Surrounded by fallen leaves of various colours... 
Vibrance.. 
That's the word. 

Seeing how a season is ending, my stay here in Auckland is also coming to an end.. I will be back on that plane, struggling to fill up my time during an 11-hour flight, and a further 5-6 hour bus + car trip to my hometown, back in Malaysia.

It will be a few days of running essential errands in Taiping, before going back to Gua Musang to face the many challenges of a teacher, teaching in less than satisfactory conditions and dealing with hormonal and identity-developing teenagers... 

But the good news is, with every end of a season, comes a brand new season, a brand new start waiting to be filled with amazing adventures and stories of God's works... And I can't wait to go back to my classes, energized and recharged after such a lovely break here in Auckland while knowing we are moving closer to the day that ends the distance for good...

With just about 2 seasons down the road, 

God-willing, 

Alex and I will be celebrating the same seasons, in the same timezone, on the same ground....

in a place we could call home :')

Review: Olaf's Artisan Bakery & Cafe

After hearing Alex exclaiming about this particular place over viber and sometimes torture me with pictures of his loot, I was more than excited to try out the treats myself... Thankfully the wait wasn't too long and on the 3rd day of my arrival, Alex took me to Olaf's Artisan Bakery & Cafe at Mt Eden for a well-needed brunch!

My oh my was it packed. While queuing up, my eyes were glued to the cabinet selection... Alex was telling me to just pick whatever I want and that we could even take-away, but as usual, the Asian in me would be doing a lot of mental calculations and we ended up sharing an egg-benedict with some sweet treats...

Alex's first pick was that delectable portugese egg tart (that of course has a fancier name which I could not remember); while I picked that raspberry and custard brioche... Before we were about to pay, Alex suddenly ordered the third pastry (no idea what's it called) but turned out to be a let down...

I really love the raspberry and custard brioche as not only it will look good in pictures, it was surprisingly amazing!

I would say its a very well-balanced delight. you have the sourness of the berries, the creaminess from the custard, and some bitterness and sweetness from the decadent belgium chocolate... It's a dessert that won't make you feel 'jelak' or sick from it (if you get what I mean)..

The not-so-up-to-the-mark for us would be these two items here..

That pastry with the powdered sugar on top just tasted kinda 'meh' to me, and probably too sweet for my liking... And the husband's mocaccino with extra chocolate (He's the one with the sweeter tooth) turned out to be quite diluted and didn't have the 'kick'...

My flat white on the other hand,

... was divine...

I love how fragrant the coffee is with slight bitterness and punch, supported by the velvety texture of the milk.... Ahhhh... I love my coffee... hahahaha

And finally came our Eggs Benedict on Sourdough with in-house citrus-cured salmon

A lil hefty in price, at $21.50 one would expect at least some salad greens on the side but it is a pretty damn good dish. I particularly like the combination of the creamy hollandaise sauce and the runny yolks, together with the sourdough bread.... It was addictive!

Definitely a great place with great food! I rate it as 'WILL VISIT AGAIN, and AGAIN and AGAIN' lol.

The man I married

This entry had a lot of interruptions, causing me to write... paused... saved as draft... rewrote... reedited... paused... etc.

Because, let's face it... Marriage is not perfection. And is never as simple as 'happily ever after.'

One moment I would be in cloud nine counting my blessings; the next I would be grumpy and dissatisfied because of some disagreements that we had as a married couple. In fact, 30 minutes ago I just got rebuked by Alex for not bringing him the right black belt. Yup.

We are so different in so many ways and I get upset by how particular or even anal he is about certain things...

He is so disciplined and independent that he makes me feel useless and redundant at times...

He has a sharp tongue and when he is not in a fine mood, he unconsciously provokes and snaps at people... And I know I had been hurt by the negativity that comes out of his lips, especially when he says things like 'I should have known better not to expect much from you'....or.. 'I should have just done it myself..' (Referring back to how he wants things done in a certain way and I am just not good in following instructions or doing those same chores that I do back home in his ways)..

EVEN SO,

I do know that I married an amazing man.

He has his imperfections and neither am I a saint. I am messy, impatient, clumsy, which directly clashes with his perfectly aligned routines and methods.

But his imperfections also made him the man I have no regrets in marrying.

He is so disciplined that he wakes up at 6am, gets his breakfast done, wipes the car (every single morning), does a 30-minute sit (to strengthen his posture), reads the news, showers, shaves, and prepares for work even though he only needs to leave home at 9am.


He is so disciplined that every time he comes back, he would first clean the shoes he wore (special treatment and cleaning would be done for his white Lacoste), placed them back into the box, complete with the protective layer of papers... (While I chucked the shoes wherever, running into the house)

And when I asked why would he go to that extent, while assuming that he has OCD, he merely explained that he is maintaining the condition and quality of the items he possesses... Of which becomes a really important trait that sustained our Long Distance Relationship... As much effort as he puts in to care for his shirts, shoes, cars etc, he puts in even more effort in our relationship. Not a day passes throughout the 5 years and 8 months without communication between us. Other than a few instances that could not be avoided, we have at least 1 hour of interaction (be it through Viber, Skype or whatnot) Every. Single. Day.

As fast as his tongue is, as fast he is to pacify me and cheer things up. It's either I let go really easily or he is really good at being funny lol. Somehow, I never managed to put on that pissed off face long enough before I cracked out in laughter.

I know he has a lot of things in his mind, especially when our financial situation causes strains, but yet he puts me high in his priorities. For instances,

He is a man, who would warm up the bathroom and bring my towel in before I enter to shower.
He is a man, who would take the yoghurt out from the fridge and let it warm a lil for me, before I consume it.
He is a man who finishes up any food I cooked regardless of whether it was a successful attempt, not leaving even a single grain of rice.
He is a man who would make me desserts. I especially love his baked flans.
He is a man who massages for me, especially when I have menstrual cramps.
He is a man who would looked up bus times, restaurant reviews, and sends me a comprehensive guide when I mentioned about wanting to go into the city on my own.
He is a man who makes sure I have my vitamins, and that I use the hand lotion after I do any washings.
He is a man who goofs around and plays childish tricks with me lol.
He is a man who stood by my side even when he was persecuted.
He is a man who hugs me, kisses me, and tells me he loves me every day.
He is a man who prays for me, every day.
He is a man who held on for more than five years of long distance, albeit the MANY challenges and storms, and said his vows without any hesitations...


I may not have achieved many of my dreams and my current circumstances may still be a distance away from the ideal, but while many spend a lifetime searching for the right partner, I am glad that the man I married, is the man that completes me and makes me a better person, the man I could envision a lifelong journey with.

With less than a week to go before going back to Long-Distance-Marriage, I shall savour every single waking moment, with this man I married :)